Monday, March 3, 2008

Everyday is Holocaust Day in the P.A.

ISL - Ramallah
President of the Palestinian Authority, Mahmoud Abbas, announced a new Holocaust Day to commemorate the memory of the thirty two terrorists which were killed in yesterday's Holocaust. This most recent Holocaust was perpetrated by Israeli forces operating in Gaza in an attempt to stop the murder of Israeli civilians.

Abbas eulogized the dead terrorists, mentioning some of them by name and praising their accomplishments. The Palestinian President dwelled upon the tragic fate of Ahmad, the fifteen year-old son of arch-terrorist Mahmoud Zahar:
"Ahmad was a fine young terrorist, beloved by all who knew him, always the life of the party or the terrorist operation, as the case may be. Oh Ahmad, whose life was nipped in the bud before he ever had the chance to live it to the fullest," lamented the President, "It was only lately that you started launching rockets at Israeli towns, a short-lived pleasure that was taken away all too soon.
"Ahmad dedicated his life to the people," said Abbas,



"He could assemble a rifle in the dark in 20 seconds and he was a trained sharpshooter, able to hit an Israeli soldier or a kibbutz volunteer in the head at 300 meters, a feat he preformed, unfortunately, only once – such talent is rare and will be missed by all of us, as will be missed his contagious enthusiasm for killing Jews – even when others would waver or tire from the incessant murder of innocents, always the young, optimistic Ahmad would be there at their side, lifting the people's spirits or else threatening to kill their families and rape their sisters if they lose the faith – that was the kind of young man he was, ever the role model, always living up to the great expectations of his father and his people. The tireless, bright young man had a brilliant future ahead of him – who knows how many Jews he could have killed? With his talent and breeding and dedication – perhaps thousands. But, alas, we will never know.

"Also, Ahmad never got the chance to feel the pleasure of killing a Jew with his own hands and sadly, now he never will. We mourn you today because you were like a son to all of us," said Abbas, crying, "A prodigal son, full of promises yet to be broken, heinous crimes un- committed, unspeakable sins that will remain undone forever after. Standing here, in the shadow of your unfulfilled destiny, we pray for your body that it may enjoy an eternity of shagging virgins, and as to your soul, praise be to Allah who, in His wisdom, never gave you one. Amen."

The new Holocaust Day will be added to the previous ones, making a total of twenty nine Holocaust Days, each one marking a separate Holocaust suffered by the Palestinian people such as the Holocaust of Jenin in which dozens of terrorists were killed by Israel, or the Holocaust of Bargouti who is still rotting in the Israeli jail and of course the greatest Holocaust of them all, the 1947 "Nakba" in which the Palestinians failed to exterminate the remnants of the Jewish people gathered in Israel, a terrible wound that to this day remains unhealed.


You know, I get the feeling that the concept of shame would be lost on these people. Of course, having an imbecile like Matan Vilna'i in charge of anything doesn't help. He stepped right into it this time, didn’t he?

Related:
Abbas, the Holocaust denier, knows a Holocaust when he sees one. No suprises here, I guess.

Matan Vilna'i's Shoah comments - from Jpost. Really, since when does the Hebrew language lack words to describe ruin and destruction? What a moron.


Marwan Barghouti's indictment - what kind of people would express admiration for such a man?

Survivor of Palestinian 1948 Holocaust: I will never forget the horrible sight of thousands of Jews, fighting for their lives - and succeeding.



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Sunday, March 2, 2008

Israel Hits Murderous Office in Gaza

ISL – Gaza

In another great military victory for the Israeli Defense Forces, an entire office, belonging to PA Prime Minister Ismail Haniyeh from the Hamas, was obliterated. Fortunately, the office was empty so no innocent terrorists were hurt in the daring, pre-dawn raid.
Minister of Defense Ehud Barak praised the Israeli Air Force which managed a direct hit at the terrorist office without damaging any other nearby innocent offices, "In accordance with international law Israel takes great care in preserving the lives of innocent buildings," Barak said, "Even though in this case, as in many others, the vile terrorists hide their offices among many other, civilian offices".

PM Haniyeh himself said that he was glad that the Israel destroyed his office, "I hated it – the color scheme was terrible and the view of Gaza city was even worse."
The Palestinian PM also said that he already has prepared the plans for a new office which will be done in the Bauhaus style – I am a great fan of Ludwig Mies van der Rohe," said the PM, "And I'm really excited about the new décor."

Israeli PM Ehud Olmert praised the decisive action and especially pointed out the diligence of the forces in sparing the lives of Haniyeh and his henchmen, "Sooner or later we will have to talk with Haniyeh or someone like him so there is no point in killing him, in fact, it will only make matters worse," said Olmert,


"'Better the genocidal maniac you know' is our policy," said the PM.

The PM's office is already preparing the Next Great 10-Year Peace Plan which will deeply involve the radical Hamas, "Nobody likes to be left out, especially dedicated anti-Semitic murderers and criminals like the Hamas so, in this respect, it is obvious that we have to bear some of the responsibility for the situation in Gaza," Olmert said.
Olmert added that he hopes that the ritual hostilities will be over as quickly as possible so that the Peace talks between the parties can resume, "I need at least one Peace Conference a week or else I'm just not myself," Olmert admitted.


OK, really, can someone tell me why destroying an office is news? Did the office kill anybody? Did it organize attacks? Was it a genocidal office? Have we sunk so low we are now attacking holes and offices?
In my humble opinion, we are the victims of a state of mind and until we change this state of mind, nothing will really change.

For instance:
Leftists maybe voting for Bibi is nice but I think an apology is also warranted – after all, the Meretz Peace has killed so many people and ruined the lives of literally millions, Jews and Arabs, that the least people like Yael should do is admit their mistake, apologize and do everything they can to correct it – starting from punishing, even ostracizing, their own guilty, lying leaders – in the media, politics and the Supreme Court.
Sorry, end of rant.

Related:
The original report which made the front page of both INN and Jpost - Haniyeh's Office Hit by IAF

Smelling salts anyone? Meretz voters for Bibi from Yael the Olehgirl.

Israeli Government Hits Palestinians with Harsh Concessions After Sderot Attack

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Thursday, February 28, 2008

New York Knicks Sued for Fan Abuse

ISL – New York

The inevitable has finally happened: a group of New York Knicks fans have filed a class action suit against the New York Knicks and Madison Square Garden, "on behalf of abused Knicks fan all over the country," according to the group's lawyer, David Bergman. The group of fans called "Knicks Survivors Support Group" is seeking over a billion dollars in damages for what they are calling "cruel and unusual treatment of a fan base".

The group was formed two years ago when lifetime Knick fan, Chris Trenchmark, committed suicide after the Knicks forty point loss to the Atlanta Hawks, "I can't take it anymore," Chris wrote in his suicide note, "There is no hope left, all I see is darkness and the specter of Isaiah Thomas standing on the sidelines, smirking and taunting me till eternity."

Galvanized by the death of their friend, Chris's fellow fans formed a support group. Within days hundreds had joined, eager to share their shame and pain and agony, "For the first time I met people who understood what I have been going through in the past four years," said Kieth, a devoted member. As more people joined and the extent of abuse suffered by the fans, once shamefully hidden and now openly discussed, became clear, the group decided to ask the courts for help, "The New York Knicks have literally ruined the lives of tens of thousands of people," said the group's lawyer, "People have lost their jobs, gone insane and committed suicide. Some have got divorced and many have developed serious health problems. This is bigger and worse then what the tobacco companies did in the past," said Mr. Bergman,


"There is no doubt in my mind that what James Dolan and Isiah Thomas have done to Knicks' fans is un-American, unconstitutional and downright evil. I am sure that after hearing the evidence, any reasonable jury will agree."

The group says that it will rely on the personal, heart-wrenching testimony of Knicks fans, on New-York City's Welfare Department which estimates that the number of homeless and destitute people in New York in the past has risen by twenty percent due to the addition of abused Knicks fans and, of course, the abysmal record of the club and most importantly: the cruel trades inflicted upon the fan base. For instance, the trade for Zach Randolph, resulting in this travesty: (courtesy of BasketBawful)



"As you can see for yourself, inflicting this brand of basketball on a loyal, dedicated and knowledgeable fan base numbering millions, can only be understood as one of the worst cases of fan abuse that America has ever seen. Hopefully, soon, justice will be served, and the sidelines of MSG will be cleared of the corruption and evil that has resided there for far too long," said Mr. Bergman

Knicks President and coach, Isaiah Thomas, refused to address the charges, "Garden policy forbids discussion of the game, the players or the fans by any unauthorized Garden employee. I'm sorry," said Isaiah, "That's just the way it is. In fact, I shouldn't have told you that much either."

An official spokesman for MSG disclosed that the Garden Security Force is familiar with this extremist group of fans, "We have been aware of their existence from the beginning and have been following them closely," said the spokesman, "Extensive files on each and everyone of these troublemakers has been compiled and when the time comes they will be revealed for the traitors and criminals that they are."

Related:
If you follow the Knicks you know there is no lack of material concerning this ongoing fiasco. I'll just list the most recent:
A cartoon lampooning the Knicks, via Truehoop.

The Zach Randolph video from BasketBawful – the most hilarious, basketball-related clip I have seen in years.

Also, check out this great satire of the Knicks from "Posting and Toasting", a rather bitter Knick blog. Can't blame them, really.

Commissioner Goodell Reveals New England Patriots Spy Network!

P.S. I know this is way off topic for this blog but sometimes it is good to stray from the familiar and discover that there are other people out there with bigger worries than merely surviving another day – like those poor Knick fans.

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