Tuesday, May 8, 2007

Peres Stuns Israel, Says: "I am Willing To Become Prime Minister"

Astonished Israelis Ask: Peres is still alive?

ISL – Jerusalem
Long time member of Knesset Shimon Peres stunned Israel today when he declared his willingness to become prime minister in place of the beleaguered Olmert. Throughout his years of quiet service to the country he loves, Peres has become well known for refusing any kind of publicity or any job that entails perks furnished by public funds such as free, prolonged, extensive travels to foreign countries.
Peres has steadfastly refused positions of power in past Israeli governments, preferring to work silently in the shadows of others in order to further his vision of a just and humane society. In his endless years of toil for the public, Peres has led the fight on poverty, raising the issue fearlessly. He has fought for the rights of persons with disabilities, for Ethiopian immigrants and many other small, neglected and disenfranchised groups that through Peres found a way to reach the public conscious. Peres always refused to kowtow to the powerful economic and political conglomerates that rule Israel, or to prevailing public opinion, always preferring to cater to the simple needs of the proverbial "man on the street" while shunning the publicity accorded to political fads such as "Peace Talks" and "The New Middle East". In fact Peres fought bitterly against them saying: "With the money Israel has spent on pointless peace initiatives, we could have solved long standing problems such as poverty, unemployment and traffic accidents in Israel".

In a press conference in Jerusalem,Peres talked to awe struck reporters, most of whom had heard of Peres only in rumors: "You all know me as a quiet and reserved politician" said the ancient Peres "but I have decided now to come out of the shadows and finally expose my self to the Israeli public, solely for the good of the country."
" You know me " said Peres: " I did not ask for it, I do not want it, but for the good of the country – I will take it upon myself"
Peres said that he would wait till Olmert stepped down: "Backstabbing and behind the back , shifty political maneuvers are not my style" said Peres.
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