Coming back from a lengthy and refreshing vacation, Yuli Tamir, Israel's controversial Education Minister, announced a new scheme called "Learning to Forget", which is intended to shake up the sleepy, out-dated Israeli education system.
According to Tamir, scientific research has proven that Israeli pupils forget most of what they are taught, resulting in an enormous waste of time and money:
"For a whole year we teach them math or history or physics and then, within a few days or months of the tests, they forget nearly everything, so really, what's the point?" said Tamir to reporters.
The emphasis in the new "Forgetting to Learn" curriculum will be, therefore, on getting straight to the point, in other words, instead of teaching and memorizing and testing and then forgetting – students will now be obliged to forget what they aren't taught - immediately.
The plan, which is also backed by the Treasury, is expected to save millions for the state, since teaching hours, educational materials, and school equipment such as chairs and tables will be cut back and , perhaps, eventually , eliminated altogether: "We live in the age of information where there is so much knowledge, it is simply useless trying to make sense of it all", said Tamir, "I know I don't understand anything so why should anyone else?" said Tamir, who also discussed an important, added benefit of the plan:
"As long as people remember what happened, and who wronged who and when – there is simply no chance for peace. So if we want real, true peace in our time, we just have to forget – who we are, why we are here, what happened and when and where – all of this stupid, useless history that will continue to cause strife and pain to all of us as long as it exists," said Tamir.
As leader of this movement, Tamir has already set an example by forgetting everything she ever knew about her nation and most everything else, besides. Tamir has also issued a directive to all education workers to do the same within thirty days. Blank history books will be issued forthwith to replace the old fact-filled books that have been such an obstacle to peace all these years, and tests will be revised.
For example, a standard question in the new history exam will look something like this:
1. Who was Yehudah HaMaccabi? (circle the correct answer)
A- Nickname of Yehuda Berkowitz, a combo guard for the great Maccabi Tel-Aviv teams in the seventies and eighties.
B- I forgot.
C – Leader of the Hasmonean revolt against Antiochus in the second century BCE.
D- A violent, evil man who opposed peace.
Correct answer: B.
If you answered "D" you receive half the points. If you answered "C" you are probably going to be, or already have been, jailed/kicked out of your house in the name of "Peace" . If you answered "A", well, such ignorance is really inexcusable – Mickey Berkowitz of course, not Yehudah!!!