Monday, December 3, 2007

Ahmanedijad Promises to make Israel "A Light Unto the Nations"

In a surprising gesture, radical Iranian President Ahmanedijad sent his best wishes to the Israeli Government on the eve of Hanukkah, the Festival of Lights. The President, who has continually voiced his opposition to the very existence of the Jewish state said that he understands that the Jewish people yearn to be "a light unto the nations" and that although the Jews have failed – quite miserably - in that endeavor, Iran has come up with the perfect solution: "If everything goes as planned, next time this year, Iran will help the Jews fulfill their dream of the ages – we will light them up, all six million of them, and then, at last, if only for a few brief moments, the Jews will truly be "a light unto the nations".

Israeli PM Ehud Olmert expressed his elation over the new attitude of the Iranian regime, "Obviously, the Iranian regime has been deeply affected by the understandings reached and the open, friendly atmosphere at the Annapolis Summit and it now wants to a part of the process instead of part of the problem."
Olmert invited Iran to open low-level, unconditional peace talks with Israeli delegates, saying, "We have never taken land from the Iranians so there isn't much we can give them back, but if they insist, they can have Transportation Minister Mofaz and I'm sure former President Katzav was wishing he was back in Iran…"

Olmert also said that under the new conditions set by the gracious announcement of the Iranian President, a strike to take out Iran's nuclear facilities is out of the question, "Clearly they want nuclear power for peaceful purposes and of course a strike now, when we are on the eve of a great diplomatic breakthrough, would be completely irresponsible."
Olmert also addressed the intriguing Iranian surprise planned for next year, "I love surprises and I'm happy the Iranian people are willing to work so hard to give Israel what must undoubtedly be a magnificent present but I can't stand waiting for a whole year," Olmert said, "The suspense will kill me."

It's killing us already Olmert, believe me!
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