Monday, January 28, 2008

Demographic Threat to Israel Grows by Another 5% Experts Say

ISL – Tel Aviv

Experts have been predicting for years that a Palestinian population explosion in the West Bank will change the very nature of Israel. Fortunately, those dire predictions have proven false – it seems that contrary to demographic trends mapped out by experts such as Professor Pergula, Palestinian women do not give birth to twenty five children, on average. And they also do not marry at the age of ten. So for now, Israel is safe from that demographic threat. But some experts now say that another, more sinister threat is rising in Judea and Samaria – the dire threat of Zionism combined with Orthodox Judaism.

Specifically, a recent report from the Israeli Ministry of Interior states that the Jewish population in Judea and Samaria has risen by more than five percent in the past year. According to experts, this primitive population is, for religious reasons, opposed to the murder and rape of Jews and Jewish property and as such presents a serious and continuing threat to the very nature of contemporary Israeli society, "There is no doubt in my mind that the demographic threat is imminent – I see it as an ugly dark cloud of Zionist Judaism gathering in the horizon," says Itamar Lifshitz, Regional Coordinator for "Peace Happily Ever After" (PHEA) - an international NGO aiming to adjust life in Israel to the world view presented in children's fairy tales. PHEA is working ceaselessly to alert the Israeli public to the demographic threat while doing its best to counter it.

"There is a saying" said Itamar, " ' He who wants to prepare for Peace Now, must prepare for war with the settlers' and that is what we are doing - we see it as a no-holds-barred, no- prisoners-taken, fight to the Peace. We are throwing at them everything we can –court orders and injunctions, riot police and Palestinian terrorists, triple-double secret agents and terrifying, seditious media exposés .
"And although the recent growth can be considered a setback," said Itamar, "I for one, have no doubt that our pure love of Justice and Human Rights and everything Good and Moral, combined with the political and financial clout of the European Union, the Arab League, the Third World and the Fourth Estate not to mention the Israeli Supreme Court, will eventually win the day," concluded Itamar.

I would not be so sure of that. If the astonishing faith of these young girls is any measure, the ending of this particular fairy tale will not be the one that Peace Now intended...

Related:
The original article from INN

"The Failure of Demographers" an interesting piece from Yoram Ettinger illustrating that due to intense politicization, the state of Israeli Academia is rapidly approaching complete uselessness.
I can't wait till the Left figures out a way to impose the point of view that 2+2 equals 5...

Are Settlers Human? New Study Causes Uproar in Israeli Academia
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2 comments:

Batya said...

Of course, that was the purpose of Disengagement. Gush Katif had a high birthrate and the Left was afraid, especially since the males, a lot tougher than the Gush Dan wimps, were taking over the army. It's harder to procreate in a crowded, flimsy caravan.

satiricohen said...

Well, somebody is procreating.
The law of unintended consequences is going to bite the Left in its collective tush one of these days.

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