Sunday, September 4, 2011

Sources in Rohan: Aragorn Return May Harm Peace Talks Between Gondor and Mordor

Edoras, February 13, 3018 -  Unnamed sources in Edoras, where the third round of peace talks between Gondor and Mordor are being held, disclosed yesterday that rumors of the return of the King of Gondor have had an unsettling effect on the discussions. "The return of the king threatens the stability of the current regime and makes it less likely to achieve an agreement, since the representatives of Mordor fear that a different regime may not honor previous agreements," sources said.
Another concern raised in political circles in Rohan was the possibility that the return of the king may fan the flames of nationalist sentiment among the Gondor populace and renew their hopes of victory. "A change in public opinion will almost certainly prevent the peaceful disengagement of Gondor troops from Ithilien," sources close to the peace talks said, emphasizing that this matter had already been considered by many "a done deal".

"Peace or Else", a Gondor-based NGO that advocates a peaceful resolution to the conflict with Mordor, issued a statement saying that "Gondor does not need a war-mongering king.  If the king really cares about Gondor then he should stay in the North and let the talks reach their peaceful conclusion."
The peace talks were initiated and are being held under the auspices of Grima Wormtongue, chief counselor to Theoden, King of Rohan.
Aragorn, the supposed heir of Elendil, was unavailable for comment.

I was re-reading the LOTR lately, and I wondered how the War of the Ring would have looked like if Gondor had to deal with all the post-modern, liberal crap that Israel and the West have to deal with today. This is my first attempt at describing such a world, and the implications seem quite grim.

I admit that I truly long for the days when most people knew the difference between right and wrong and were not afraid to say it and stand for it. But then again, maybe there never were such days; maybe they always existed only in fairy tales.
Follow IsraelSatireLab on Twitter

No comments: